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Destigmatizing mental health treatment this holiday season: ‘Seeking help is not a sign of weakness’

Chicago Tribune - 12/12/2019

Bronzeville resident Alexis Brown was driving to a friend’s south suburban home in the early morning hours of March 16 when exhaustion led to her collision with a median in Dolton.

The self-taught mixologist said she doesn’t really know the sequence of events after that, but she does recall not being able to feel her right upper thigh because the crash had broken her femur in half. The crash also broke her jaw in three places, her hand and her thumb. But her ankle was the worst. It took her eight months to relearn how to walk.

“I hit the median head-on, and the first responders didn’t expect someone to survive that,” she said. “I couldn’t put any pressure on my foot for the first two or three months after the accident, and my mouth was wired shut, so I had to get fed through a syringe. I couldn’t use the bathroom because I couldn’t move to the bathroom that well. The nurses would have to change me.”

In the hospital for a little under a week, the 30-year-old said she had a mini-mental breakdown the day that they were trying to discharge her. Looking back, Brown said, the accident occurred because she felt she had to “be present for everything, be involved in everything,” because if she didn’t, she wouldn’t be relevant -- especially in the bartending industry, where she is one of only a few people of color.

“I was trying to cram everything in. Normally, I take a nap before a shift, but I didn’t and worked a shift from about 9 p.m. to about 5 a.m.,” she said.

Being “on” all the time. Social isolation. Both can be causes of a mental health tailspin, especially during the holiday season, says Dr. Olusola Ajilore, an associate professor in the Department of Psychiatry at the University of Illinois at Chicago and a researcher with UIC’s Center on Depression and Resilience.

“Around the times of the holidays, people have constant reminders of what one’s ideal life should look like, surrounded by friends and family, and if that’s not your reality, it can be very difficult with a lot of the images you see in commercials,” he said. “It’s a constant reminder of what one might be missing in one’s life, and that can be difficult dealing with during the holidays.”

But that’s not the only cause of concern when talking about mental health in black and brown communities. Therapy is taboo for many, so the topic is often not discussed. Socioeconomic barriers and historical factors, including slavery, police brutality and mass incarceration as well as educational, social and economic discrimination can play parts in accessibility to mental health services.

According to the Health and Human Services Office of Minority Health, African Americans are 10% more likely to experience serious psychological distress than the average American, and approximately 30% of African American adults with mental illness receive treatment each year, compared with the U.S. average of 43%, according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI).

“What I hear from some of my patients is that even though they’ve come to terms with their mental illness and have insight into their condition and what they need to do to treat it, they sometimes face resistance from friends or a family member,” Ajilore said. “I had a patient whose family members threw away her medication. This was a woman on antidepressants and mood stabilizers. She was actually off medication for some time before I could get her back on. It’s really difficult because there are a lot of barriers for people to even get to the point where they’re seeing a psychiatrist or a therapist, and then to get that kind of resistance makes it very difficult.”

The unwritten rule is that you’re expected to deal with trauma and tragedy and get over it just by being strong, Ajilore said. He typically counsels patients dealing with such situations by telling them to set up appropriate boundaries with a loved one who may be toxic or difficult, someone who doesn’t believe that they need to get treatment or that they need to pray more or use other methods.

“Seeking help is not a sign of weakness,” Ajilore added. “Everybody needs help, and there are qualified people out there that can deliver that help. The important thing is one needs to pay attention to their emotional well-being, which is just as important as their physical well-being. Oftentimes I will have patients who say, ‘I’ve tried therapy -- it wasn’t for me.’ And I’ll say maybe it just wasn’t the right fit. Sometimes you might have to meet with two or three therapists or audition a couple of people before you find the right one.”

Brown, co-founder of Causing A Stir, whose goal is to “educate new emerging talent and empower leaders in underserved and underrepresented communities within the hospitality industry,” agrees. While others would be discouraged by an accident such as hers, Brown chose to slow down and “pay attention to what’s important in life.” She’s back behind the bar these days, but she can’t stand on her feet as long as she could before the accident. She gets fatigued, her ankle swells and high volume shaking of drinks doesn’t happen as often because her grip isn’t what it once was.

“I had to get back,” she said. “It is my livelihood, so I try to do what I can with what I have. I have a lot of help, and that’s how I’m able to bring other people in and open up the opportunities for other people.

“I was filling up my schedule so much, I never had time for myself just to decompress. I would just say, ‘Yes, I’ll be there. I’ll try to make that happen,’” she said. “Since I was forced to literally sit down and be with myself and my thoughts after the accident, I wrote out who I wanted to become coming out of this. I just felt this can’t be my life, so I changed my circumstances. Sometimes the things that we’re going through ... we have to grasp the fact that sometimes we have to fight a little bit harder to get out of certain circumstances, but it’s worth it all in the end. And therapy can help with coping with those things.”

Ajilore thinks the stigma against getting mental health treatment has lessened over time due to better portrayals of mental illness in the media. He said healthy portrayals of mental illness in shows like “Empire” and “The Real Housewives of Atlanta” tend to “normalize mental health treatment.”

“Even in music, you have a lot of rappers who are very open about their mental health struggles. Giving a voice to it makes it easier for people to seek help when they recognize it in the people that they admire,” he said.

drockett@chicagotribune.com

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